Small Group Guide: 
Self-Control | Fruit of the Spirit | Part 9

Opening Prayer

Key Takeaways:
1. Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit, not an act of the will. It's different from willpower alone—willpower eventually runs out, but Spirit-empowered self-control transforms our character.

2. A person without self-control is like a city with broken walls. We need boundaries to protect what comes in and goes out of our lives, or we lose ourselves.

3. Self-control is choosing purpose over pleasure. We discipline ourselves not just for ourselves, but for Jesus—the one who called us.

4. We find self-control by keeping our eyes on Jesus. Just as Jesus chose purpose over pleasure for us, we choose it for Him.

Discussion Questions:
1. What's the difference between willpower and self-control? Why does the pastor say willpower "only buys you time"? Have you experienced this in your own life?

2. Read Proverbs 25:28. What does it mean that "a person without self-control is like a city with broken down walls"? What are some practical "walls" or boundaries we need in our lives today?

3. Pastor Kyle said, "We don't discover ourselves in a lack of control. We find ourselves when we gain control of our lives." How does our culture teach the opposite? Why is this message countercultural?

4. Be honest: What's one area of your life that feels "out of control" right now? (Examples: anger, spending, eating, screen time, relationships, substances, your tongue, etc.)

5. What specific boundaries do you need to set up to protect your "city"? Think about:

What needs to stop coming IN to your life?
What needs to stop going OUT from your life?
Who do you need boundaries with?

6. "Self-control is choosing purpose over pleasure." What is one pleasure you need to say "no" to this week in order to say "yes" to God's purpose for your life?

Practical Applications:

Choose ONE area where you need self-control and take these three steps:

Identify your TRUE purpose - Write down why you want self-control in this area, focusing on honoring Jesus, not just improving yourself.

Set a specific boundary - What's one concrete wall you need to build? (Example: "I will not look at my phone after 9pm" or "I will not go to that store alone")

Lock eyes on Jesus daily - Spend 5 minutes each morning asking Jesus to help you choose purpose over pleasure in this specific area.

Closing Prayer
- Pray for each person's specific area where they need self-control
- Ask the Holy Spirit to produce this fruit in your lives
- Thank Jesus for choosing purpose over pleasure for us on the cross
- Pray for clear vision of God's purpose for each person's life